What doesn’t kill you makes you a sharper writer.
I published this book five years ago today. At the time, I thought I was being cheeky by releasing it on Friday the 13th, 2020. It turned out to be right when lockdown began — not an ideal time to release a commercial product, but at least it was out there for the right people to find at the right time down the line. The book chronicles a year of living dangerously and having great fun, shedding more than a few pants and tears along the way. My whole point in writing it was to capture and appreciate the time for what it was – and honor the incomparable people who colored it – and then let it go. I lived through it and bled on the pages. That was enough. Thank you, and good night. Unfortunately, what was meant as a snapshot of a chapter in my life that I’ve since put away has been misinterpreted by some as a calling card. Perhaps the most disheartening aspect of dating as someone who does things some may consider interesting is that people are often eager to take advantage of wild nights, backstage passes, fancy dinners, and being in the same space as well-known individuals but show no interest in accompanying me through the restless evenings, high demands, and soul-crushing effort that goes into earning those perks. It’s much easier to play rock star now and then than it is to keep the lights on, but one activity has more value to me than the other.
Sorry to disappoint, but writing is hell, and making a living from it is painfully hard work. This is who I am and what I do; I have no choice in the matter. Either you’re here for it all, or you’re welcome to go somewhere else for your sense of fulfillment. I’m no longer interested in having anyone tag along to enjoy the spoils without being willing to stand by me through the realities of just getting through the day. If I wanted superficial nonsense, I would have stayed in LA.
(I must say, this sentiment doesn’t apply to the book’s cover model, who’s found plenty of her own glory in life and couldn’t have cared less about guest lists or time spent backstage with some famous so-and-so. I’ll always respect the hell out of that, and she’s still one of my favorite people.)
Anyway, rant over. I’m glad people enjoy the book, but I’m equally glad its contents are now in the rearview mirror. I’m proud to have written it. Onward to the next ...
EMAIL JOEL at gaustenbooks@gmail.com
